December (rarely) Daily

Exhaustion.

You know you’re in for a long day when you are last-minute throwing your work bag together, getting a coffee, giving the kids the “one minute” warning, and you reach into your purse…

and the keys are gone.

They’re not in the purse, not on the bookshelf, not on the file cabinet. Not anywhere they should be.

After looking high and low, I called the last person to have driven the car (Frank) and he said they were on the shelf. By this time I’m sweating a cold sweat, the kids are late for school, I’m late for work. I told the boys to get out to the bus, since I had no clue how we were getting anywhere (not to mention I felt a fit coming on). They went out to the bus stop. I had a second or two of indulgent sobs, then reluctantly fished out a couple dollars for my own bus ride.

I was not prepared to go metro. I hadn’t even looked into a mirror. I had to grab my backpack and leave my purse, carry my coffee and slink down to the bus stop on the opposite side of the street as my boys. One just looked at me, the other looked and then looked away. Awkward written all over his face. Their bus came. Mine, delayed.

I have no problem taking the metro. I wish it were cheaper. But, I was not ready. Not prepared. I didn’t even remember the bus I was to transfer to.

And how much is bus fare? Two dollars? More? Naturally, I had forgotten my phone in my purse at home, so I couldn’t send angry texts to my husband’s work email (lucky dog).

My ride went smoothly, but not comfortably. I kept having the feeling I was still in my slippers or pajama pants. Unprepared, that’s what it was.

The ride home felt similar, but at least I knew what I was getting into. I let myself fume a little too much, though. Especially when I found out that my husband, who was at work, had the keys in his pocket the whole time.

December Daily 0 Day 13/14

Today was a shopping day.

I dropped the kids off at school and began my rounds.

Target.
Goodwill.
Costco.
Marshalls.
Bath & Body Works.
World Market.

The problem is, along with shopping for other people, I found myself picking up little things for myself. Nothing big, a soup mix here, a shirt there (more than a shirt at Goodwill, but hey)… lotion, and this:

I had been shopping for hours and didn’t even realize it. Marshall’s has all kinds of stuff, and this here caught my eye. I figured if I could make it home without stopping for food, the mug could be my gift.

I made it. It was not easy. 2pm and I hadn’t eaten since the morning, I was ready for some food. I chomped on some ginger licorice, drank my water, and pondered on what I could eat when I got home. I knew the dog would be flipping out excited to see me, since I’d been gone so long. I also knew I had an enormous amount of stuff to take in the house, primarily from my grocery shopping at Costco.

I was so hungry I dug into the freezer and pulled out a Lean Pocket Pretzel thing.

It suited me fine. I’d rather not think so much about it and just have something that’s not going to wreck my calorie intake. It worked. A banana and half an orange rounded it out. And, my lovely mug full of fresh coffee. What a treat.

December Daily – Days 11/12

I know it doesn’t look so hot. But it tastes good, gets in some good veggies, and doesn’t cost me a lot where calories are concerned.

Layered:
rice
spaghetti squash
pepperoni
1 T. olive oil
spaghetti sauce
parmesan cheese

It’s about 400 calories, which is a little big for a lunch, but it satisfies. Comforting food. Cheap (made from leftovers, mostly). Eaten at my desk, but ah well.

December Dailies 8-9-10

I should have just named this month “December Wrestling Blog” because that is what it is turning out to be. Yesterday was high-school wrestling, today is a high-school wrestling tournament, and tomorrow is youth wrestling.

Tonight, though, is also Bookclub Dinner Out night, which I am very much looking forward to. Every time we meet, we put dues of $2.32 in our “can” and we are finally breaking into that puppy and putting it to good use. Though I will be at the tournament all day, I will meet up with the ladies for drinks and dinner and hopefully some karaoke after. Hooray.

I’ll just have to keep it on my mind that I need to get up early the next morning and drive 45 minutes to a tournament.

This morning I woke up at 6am and took Bowzer for a walk, anticipating a long day and the need to immediately perk up my brain. It was cold, but once I trudged up the hill I warmed up immensely. My thighs, though, were feeling the numb/fire of the wind whipping against them in my pajama bottoms (yes, I went there with myself). In fact, an hour later and they are still thawing out.

December Daily – Day 6

Hi ho, hi ho, it’s back to work I go. The stretch between Thanksgiving and Christmas is both long and short at the same time. I feel like I should be off the entire month, baking, shopping, going for long walks at night with Christmas lights keeping the path bright.

I’ve not baked, shopping has been online (and sparse) and the Christmas lights aren’t up much around here. It doesn’t feel much like Christmastime when there’s not a speck of snow on the ground. Looking out the window you wouldn’t know if it were heading into spring or winter. This is not an issue for some of you because you don’t get snow. For me, it is essential for winter picnics, sledding, snowballs and the entire ambiance of winter.

I feel confused, not in the “spirit” of things. Not ready. But, snow or no snow, it comes and the mood is in the air. The boys are all older and want money and more practical things for Christmas (which is helpful). They know our money situation isn’t the greatest, and have asked for pretty simple gifts, if none at all. ‘Makes my heart feel funny and confused.

December Daily – Day 5

Monday. Sluggy Monday. I feel as if I got very little accomplished.  But I did. I just never get enough accomplished. I need a week off to simply work around the house. Cleaning. Cooking. Fixing. Crying…

Today is the day that I work from home. So, at least I did get accomplished work-wise what I wanted and needed to. I also got a load of laundry washed and made dinner (super simple), and boiled noodles for spaghetti for a dinner in the next couple days (planning ahead).

Tonight we had sausage gravy and biscuits.

Sausage gravy – easiest thing to make.

1 sausage roll
1/2 cup flour
2 cups milk
salt, pepper to taste

Heat sausage in a skillet until cooked, breaking up pieces into crumbles. Add flour, slowly add milk until bubbly and thick. Remove; enjoy. I added some red pepper to mine. I also made mine ahead and slapped it in the crockpot for a couple hours until the kids were home from practice. They all ate it. I made eggs and a salad on the side and ate mine on a piece of toast instead of a biscuit (saving calories). Hearty, yummy meal. And pretty cheap, since I got both of my sausages free with a coupon that was on a different package of sausage.

They still have a coupon up, if you’re looking for one:

http://www.groupsave.com/JonesDairy

 

December Daily Day 4

Skinny Cow Strawberries & Cream ice cream sandwich. Good.
Skinny Cow Peanut Butter & Chocolate ice cream sandwich. Not so good.

Reheated spaghetti with pepperoni. Good.

Turkey wrapped around a cheese stick. Good.

Chorizo. Good.

Water. Good.

Guinness Beer. Good.

Peanut butter & honey sandwich. Good.

Most of what I ate today tasted pretty darn good.

 

 

December Daily – Day 3

 

Yesterday after work I went to my long-awaited appointment with my sleep study doctor.

See, a few weeks back I participated in a sleep study– wait. I shouldn’t say that. It makes it sound like I’m doing some sort of experimental study for the University. No, it was just simply an appointment to see why I have such trouble sleeping. They attached a slew of sticky disks with wires to my head, chest and legs, slapped a pulse ox on my finger, and told me to sleep. I had taken a pill to help me to sleep prior to my appointment (otherwise I’d have been up for hours, no “sleeping” for the study). I was out in sleepy land pretty quick. Until the nurse lady had to come in constantly to tell me I’d disconnected my pulse ox again, or a wire came out somewhere. Not helpful. Also, the mattress was hospital-like, with a cover made from some sort of water repelling material that makes your body sweat. And it smelled like urine.

Save all that – great night’s sleep!

I left and within a day they called to tell me that I’d benefit from a CPAP machine, and did I want to speak with a doctor, or did I want to just pick one up?

Hmm.

Speak with doctor, please.

A month later, here I am, in another waiting room. Instead of the urine stench, I was put in a patient room where the smell of cigarette smoke was so overpowering I felt as if it had seeped into my bloodstream and returned to the air through my pours. After the nurse checked me in, I couldn’t take it anymore and I threw myself in the hallway, requesting a new room. I get it; people smoke. I don’t get that it would leave a smell so lingering in that room. I was sitting there baffled. Where on earth was the overflowing ashtray hidden? The chair even reeked from the prior occupant.

A new room attained, I answered more questions and learned that I had some “episodes of apnea” during my REM stages of sleep. Besides weight loss, the only thing they really offered was a CPAP. Something that isn’t covered completely by insurance, and something I’d have to pay for. There is also weight loss, which can help (and which I’m working on — my brother-in-law needs a CPAP and he’s not a fatty, so that’s discouraging). At any rate, it wasn’t the most interesting appointment. I left feeling as if I had gone to the Geico of Sleep Study clinics, and have been offered but one solution: CPAP.

Maybe I’m stubborn and distrustful. OK. I’ll give that. But I’m not too thrilled about wearing that thing on my face, looking like I’m ready to pilot the next shuttle to the deep space. My goodness, I have enough trouble forcing myself to wear my biteguard for the horrific teeth-grinding issues I have, let alone strapping on a face mask with a nose hose. Claustrophobia? You betcha!

Last night, though, Frank encouraged me to give it a try, even if it was going to cost us some money. If it helped, it would be completely worth it.

I’ll think about it.